You are ready, you can see now, to step it up, claim it, say “Yes I will!” (and then love the gulp and fear that comes sailing in – fine, be here but you aren’t stopping me).

Announcing The Savor & Serve Experiment.

This beloved URL of Comfort Queen — with its 10+ year history of hundreds of thousands of women finding comfort and solace — will no longer be my home, although it will remain here for you to read previous entries. I express my deepest gratitude for what being the Comfort Queen has brought to my life and I respectfully lay down my crown and skip, run, and saunter into my next adventure.

I hope you’ll join me now.

Two fantastic posts that pop! sparkle! liberate! the shadow side of social media which I have seen eat at my sense of enoughness and lots o my clients and beloveds.

The eating away is such a waste of time.We don’t have time for this!

Bop on over and read the BRAVE TRUE Bright Lights, Big Shadow from Bridget Pilloud and then read Tara Sophia’s helpful balm on How to Use Social Media Sanely.

Don’t skim these, read them.

Be well, do good work and know you are so amazing – trust me.

I woke up this morning thinking,

Gosh, that’s weird. Every interaction I’ve had with her has been prompt and professional.”

Then I received this email:

So here I am.

With an apology.

I had it all mapped out…

Run to school, get the kids, feed them, stuff them in their rooms and
sit down with plenty of time left to make it for our call.

Ran to school…
Went to get the kids…

The kids weren’t there.

Apparently it was a practice day at school for their play.

*humpf*

Mika has told me there would be no practice.

I was paralyzed and pissed off. Didn’t quite know what to do.
Borrowed the office school phone and called my boyfriend to
see if he could track down your number by accessing my emails.

No good.
Couldn’t call my assistant.

I decided I was going to pull the kids out of practice, drag
their butts home and just have a lot less time for prepping for
our call.

No big deal.

Ran to Mika’s class and peeked in the door to see their practice.

I couldn’t do it.
The teacher was right in the middle of discussing Mika’s role and
I just couldn’t do it.

Sitting outside the door of her class, almost on the brink of tears,
I thought…

…what would Jennifer Louden do now?

Since I cannot call, cannot email, cannot pull my kids out of class
and will not make it home in time for the call, I’m going to throw
myself a party for one.

So I put my mitts back on and headed to a nearby park.

A big park.

I walked through the snow where no other person had appeared to walk
all winter.

I trudged myself out to the middle of huge football field and then
plopped myself back in the snow.

And for the first time in more weeks than I can count, I did absolutely
nothing.

I didn’t think.
I didn’t worry.
I didn’t try to hit the next thing on my to do list.
I lay watching snowflakes land on my eyelashes.

I took deep breaths and decided to make a snow
angel.

Brought me to tears. I walked slowly to hook myself
up with a bit of chocolate–the perfect ingredient for
my party for one.

Picked up some groceries and went to pick up the
kids smiling.

Been running ever since.

If I’d just wanted to send a dorky apology, I could have
fit it in before now.

But even as I write this my accountant is talking in one
ear on the phone with me while I pretend to be listening.

I wanted you to know that though circumstances kept
me from getting in touch with you, I hooked up telepathically
and honored your message, your wisdom.

I hope this hasn’t created a problem for you, and if
you want to flush me, I understand.

But hopefully this is evidence that women like me
need women like you to help us live with a bit more
“balance”.

Thanks, for listening and letting me  spill the beans on why I was not there Wednesday
to honor our call time and didn’t just shoot out a little explanation earlier.

Love and long, hot baths,

Tera

Life does not happen the way we script. It’s nice when we can leave some white space for emergencies but we can’t always do that or we would be god.

So next time you screw up, remember Tera taking care of herself instead of spending the hour waiting for her kids fretting and swearing.

And then take the time to make a poetic honest apology.

Because that apology inspired my heart and that totally rocks.

Thanks Tera!

P.S. Savor and Serve the World, my new project, is slowly getting finished. I can’t wait to unveil it to you.

Brene Brown of TED talk fame is my latest.

If you don’t know Brene,  you must. Her books are sheer brilliance and she has that wholeness and realness that the world needs.

We meant to talk for 20 minutes. After 70, we had to make ourselves stop.

I excerpted a bit of the video love for you (if you don’t see a video in your email, click here). It’s about Shadow Comforts and numbing out and creativity… hint: if you are want to create and are standing in front of the fridge and eating instead or surfing blogs (hmmmm….) then watch this video.

Part Two of our fab fest will be on Brene’s site soon- still only the tip of our sizzling iceberg (excuse mixed temperature metaphor). The whole sizzler is at the Cafe but of course.

Questions about shadow comforts? Ask away!

P.S.The price of the Cafe goes up to $27 February 5th. Get in now and you pay only $19 for as long as you are a member. Those of you who are sampling the Cafe for free, you got a special invite in your email, be sure and check that first.

When you look around and cock your head (think: RCA dog) and ask yourself, “Why is that so popular?” or “I don’t get it” or “Yuck,” trust that.

Trust that questioning, that niggling, that contraction in your belly.

Not because you are such a genius (though you are, or you wouldn’t be here reading this) and not because I’m urging you to become a judgmental crank.

I want you to trust what you know.

The world is full of the unreal, amplified a million times by the media and the interwebs and a general lack of discernment. The unreal is streaming into your awareness and it needs your awareness to counter it

+

you are ahead of the pack, the curve, the time. You do know more. Period.

Honor that you are ahead, that you know, that you see.

The world needs you to know what you know.

That niggling in your belly that says such and such is not real or not for you or simply doesn’t feel right?

It’s your current truth.

Meet it.

Fiercely.

Trust it.

Completely.

No, don’t make it into a rigid rule or noxious gossip. You don’t even have to tell anybody.

Simply say, “Yes, that is my knowing.”

“For now.”

P.S. Early bird price for my world famous Taos Writer’s Retreat goes away January 30th. Save money and get free coaching. A few spots left.