Great article to read on Salon about Orpah’s influence via The Secret – here’s a clip: "It’s a culture where superstition is "spirituality," illiteracy is
"authenticity," and schoolmarm moralism is "character." It’s a culture
where people apologize by saying, "I’m sorry you took offense at what I
said," and forgive by saying, "I’m not angry at you anymore, I’m
grateful to you for teaching me not to trust shitheads like you." And
that’s the part that should bother us most: the diminishing, even
implicit mocking, of genuine goodness, and of authentic spiritual
concerns and practices. Engagement, curiosity and active awe are in
short supply these days, and it’s sickening to see them."
This is a huge fear of mine — that my ideas and books and retreats somehow collapse into this realm of smarmy empty narcissism. I know I try to stay deep and true to the truly rigorous idea of a life well-lived is started in acceptance of what is and then about reflection and learning, but it is so easy for that to fall into I love myself so I don’ have to do or be anything… and yet, I also know that beating myself up (or you in the form of judging) is totally a waste of time and energy…
Thoughts?
12 responses so far ↓
1 Lisa Gates Apr 26, 2007
Jennifer, I so appreciate this post. Beyond measure. Mostly I lurk, but now I have to speak.
I recently was asked by a well-known business to show the Secret and run a workshop based on the principles embodied in the film. I cringed and balked and whined, despite the fact that the core message is worthy. I knew that perception and popular culture held it in one of two places: woo woo magic, or woo woo banality. Worse, I knew that the devotees of the magic variety thought if they prayed hard enough, they would need do nothing to manifest their vision.
I wanted to run screaming, but I did it. And I asked the participants, “what are you willing to activate, to put in place, so that this experiential loveliness transforms your life, transforms into daily practice? How are you going to put wheels on this thing?” This is the place we’re responsible for.
Inside your workshops, inside your retreats, inside your books, is the real you, and the real us, and we’re dying to be taken on a REAL trip. We’re dying to be moved by you. And we really need to know that transformation and creativity and love and relationship, all of it, take hard work and commitment.
There are no quick fixes. Breathe. You’re there.
More than 2 cents…
2 Victoria Apr 27, 2007
There are so many holes in “The Secret”.
One that really saddens me is saying Jesus was a millionare?
Jesus didn’t even own his own grave. He was (and is) the Champion of the poor. He lived a life of poverty and was free from chasing after material goods.
I came across this quote by Bernard Meltzer:
“The real measure of your wealth is how much you’d be worth if you lost all of your money.”
I have your book the Life Organizer, it is a GOOD book. It’s about digging deeper into our souls to find treasures, not somebody else’s pocket.
The word that keeps coming to my mind is “mercy”. Mercy on ourselves and each other. Addressing the poverty of our lonely souls.
God bless you and hold tight to the gifts He has bestowed upon you.
3 Ellen Apr 27, 2007
As I have come to understand thru my spiritual practices & healing work….
In order to live a life WELL lived, self actualized & one based in compassion & empathy for others, it MUST starts with SELF….self realization & self knowledge…..& traveling the road LESS traveled.
Sometimes we travel with a ‘tribe’…..harder when we must go it alone….yet always with our pure intentions as the lightness under our feet to lift us up & keep us from spinning our wheels in the ditch of cowardess.
It takes courage & tenacity to stay the course….& you have one other needed element it takes to do that, from all I can surmise by your ‘musings’….it’s called humility….
& I am grateful to have ‘found’ the REAL you in this “it’s all about me” world…without having ever met you yet.
Namaste,
Ellen
4 Christina Frei Apr 27, 2007
Hi Jen -
THanks for your post.
In my experience, the Salon is very intellectual, and when it’s all about the left brain, there’s no room for belief and spirituality. Where is the wonder on The Salon? Where is the play? Does the Salon bring hope to anyone? The Secret makes it fun to imagine a better life, and lifts people’s expectations and reminds them of their full potential. It just seems completely unproductive to analyze spirituality, because we all find God in our own way. The Secret will work for some, not for others. Who’s to analyze that?
No one wants to be self-indulgent (OK, maybe some do). On the other hand, there is a big group of people out there called “sensitives” or empaths or even creatives that are completely unappreciated and TOO giving. So darn it, it’s time for them to be a little self-indulgent. Ya know? There are power-mongers who would take such a message too far, of course. That’s a different story.
The Law of Attraction exists. Period. People can take advantage of it or not. People can be conscious of it or not. It’ll be a bit messy for a while, since it’s a new thing in a culture to have this awareness be so widespread, but oh well. I’m glad this message has gotten out there in such mass proportions. The secret is just a bunch of people trying to spread the word. That’s it. I find the production cheesy, but I still watch it for the message.
And frankly, goodness and character —- what churches are showing those? what priests are out there to admire these days? Is the Salon modeling that? Hm.
I realize I’m matching the energy of argument that the article “put out there” (which it did), so I’ll just say I just get tired of a world where intellect rules all. It’s so cruel, actually. It’s the same energy that makes us not listen to our intuition and bodies, not honor ourselves. This article is case in point. We need a balance. If you’re gonna poo-poo something, you need to balance that with your vision of yumminess. Where’s the vision, Salon?
OK, that’s all!
See you in August!
Christina Frei
5 cindy Apr 27, 2007
lisa i think you put it nicely!
6 Anonymous Apr 27, 2007
Secret – Shmeecret. Oh, Oprah, did ya hafta? “Positive Thinking” by any other name has been around forever. It may not manifest filled coffers, but it can sure make your days brighter.
As for your understandable personal concern, Jen, I applaud that you “inquire” (cf. the LO). Gently checking one’s motives is good practice, but fear of fake? – I doubt you need to go there. Plus, what exactly is wrong with a little self-serving? We come with some degree of it built into our hard-wired, animal-brain survival kit. So, as you said, it is indeed more effective to non-judgmentally acknowledge human nature and monitor healthy boundaries than to waste energy swimming upstream. Lets’ instead use that energy on May 15th!
7 Jennifer Louden Apr 27, 2007
Love this comments! Christina, i totally agree that Salon is intellectual and my constant quest in life is to balance my desire to be smart and my desire to be grounded with my love of grace and God…
what I do like about The Secret is it reminds people how much effect they can have over their attitudes through working with their minds.
But to imply that women in Darfur are seeing their babies murdered before their eyes because they attracted that horror? I won’t ever buy that. The universe is not that simple or literal.
8 nicole Apr 27, 2007
amen christina! love everyone’s comments! jennifer, i have had this internal dialog as well…wondering if all of my self-inquiry and time spent engaged in “woo woo” stuff is self-serving and narcissistic in an unhealthy way (or I fear others see it this way). it’s a fine line, and the fact that you question it says that you are indeed aligned in your integrity.
9 Tuxlux May 1, 2007
Way, back when there was a phrase used by conjurers “By speaking I shall create.” In it’s original language it was “Abrac Ad Abra”.
One of my friends has another fabulous and applicable saying: “Religion is for those who are afraid they are going to hell. Spirituality is for those who’ve already been there.”
Jingoism is the heart and soul of advertising, the media overloaded world is driven by it.
“Excuse me, your life is waiting” was a less jingoistic and more gentle book on how to get yourself out of your own way.
But come on…I don’t care how much Oprah hypes any “Put pixie dust on yourself and you can fly” book…… The ultimate responsibility for discernment lies with each of us.
The Emperor is Naked. Oprah is just a talk show host. The secret to the universe is not in a mass market book.
Jennifer, your work has always represented itself as a gentle dialog on how to move through growth. I’ve never found you jingoistic, narrow minded, smarmy, or fake in any way. Your open attitude and honesty and genuine concern for each of your workshop participants keeps you out of the ‘woo woo’ camp and places you on the side of the modern day true shamans and healers.
And this Snarky old computer geek will pop anybody on the nose that says otherwise!
10 bernadette May 3, 2007
…..phew lots of thoughts about The Secret, Oprah and everything else. My own two pennyworth are a bit mixed. I believe if we think crap we get crap as in ‘I stabbed my toe, it will probably be a crappy day…you’re right it probably will be because we’ll look for stuff to support our initial belief’ if we look for what we’re grateful for in our life – we’ll find it. I think Rohnda Byrne has done a fabulous ‘marketing job’ with The Secret as in there isn’t really any secret but she’s made it seem like we’re all missing out if we don’t buy into it…and we have a choice – we don’t have to put our store in anything we don’t want to. Are we missing out? It depends on what you want. I like to think, the great unniverse, god, whoever you believe in, may have given us flowers and beautiful plants but it’s up to us to do the weeding or not as the choice may be.
It’s simple really, be kind to yourself and others, be grateful for what you have got, do the best you can, develop yourself if you want to grow as a person and share whatever gifts you may have. The choice is yours, if you’re doing the best you possibly can and are not hurting anyone else, you’ve pretty much got it made. Guilt about attracting what crap happens is just that – rubbish. Life is life and sometimes it is fabulous and sometimes it is shit and alot of the time it is just mooching along pretty much ok a few laughs a few tears but nice enough. I am a bit disappointed in Oprah because her opinion matters to so many and she can reach and influence so many, maybe it would have been better if she had of stayed in the middle and enquired a bit more, but it’s her choice and we don’t have to buy into it. At the end of the day we can’t control anyone or anything, and the only reason we get angry is because we can’t, so best not try, lead by example and show how you love your life by the way you lead it, and what you do. Self help is wonderful if you are helping yourself and not trying to influence others with it. If it works for you – great – it might not switch my buttons but thats just fine. I did a dreamboard workshop the other day and had two lovely people in it, who thought I was going to give the easy answers to winning the lottery, they didn’t want to know about personal responsibility – and maybe that’s why the secret is so popular – instant flowers without digging the garden – you will get your lovely garden but you have to do the work…. that’s enough musing from me…just a few thoughts! ps Jen, you know your work is worthwhile because it helps people enquire and enables them to think a little differently about their own choices. You’re not saying read this and the magic genie will appear, you’re saying this could be a way for your to think a little differently and maybe find a few answers to questions you hadn’t thought about…very different from empty promises…you’re real! xx b
11 Molly Gordon May 4, 2007
I remember when I first realized the power of my thoughts. Wow! I was thrilled by the realization that I could confidently stepping into a future that was not determined by my past, and the whole enterprise was imbued with enthusiasm (en-theos; “filled with God) and lightness. What’s not to love?
But then… as time went on I came to realize that what I can change is within me – not outside of me. I can become a skillful sailor; I don’t control the wind.
I wrote about this is a recent newsletter:
“Trying to make the Law of Attraction work against apparent evidence to the contrary is like climbing onto a unicycle at the top of a hill and trusting momentum to keep you from falling. The more energy you put into your carefully crafted (and sincere) intentions, the harder you hit the ground when intention crashes into Reality.
“When the Law of Attraction seems to be working, the rewards far exceed your efforts. When it isn’t, no matter how much energy you put in, you stay stuck. Fortunately, there is an explanation for both outcomes, and it can restore you to right relationship with infinite possibility.
“Whenever you use The Law of Attraction to escape something undesirable or get to something you think will be better, it is doomed to failure. That’s because you are objecting to Reality, the senior partner in your enterprise.
“[W]hen you use affirmations and positive thinking to ramp up your energy without being firmly rooted in acceptance of What Is, you will spin your wheels every time.
“Accepting – even loving – Reality is where the rubber meets the road.
“When the truth is that you don’t like the way things, then that’s the place to begin your practice of acceptance. Stop. Look. Listen to yourself. Make room for the uncomfortable thoughts and beliefs that you are so eager to get rid of.
“How do you do that? The best way I know is The Work® of Byron Katie. The Work is a direct route to acceptance, and from acceptance, creative ambition can’t help but flower.
For instructions and support in doing The Work, visit http://www.thework.com .”
[excerpted from the Authentic Promotion ezine, http://www.authenticpromotion.com
12 Michellev May 6, 2007
Jennifer, I’m trolling around and found your salon secret post. I couldn’t agree more. I’m teaching a class right now titled, “The Secret not working in your work?”. What I find in teaching Conscious Business is that often our minds set the goals, but our hearts aren’t engaged in what our soul really wants. Lets get back to a connection with self, and following our deepest desires – based upon our strengths, gifts and spirit.