I am swooning with sunlight, tender neon green buds beckoning to me, the garden sighing so loudly I weeded today in the frost with bare hands! I am swooning with creative lust, I have made 14 artist trading cards (pictures soon) in the last week. I am swooning with finishing my book, with new ideas for taking my work into the corporate world, with personal and intellectual ideas…
Here is one idea that started as a post for Keri’s blog:
Keri- what strikes me, as the observer I am (i.e. my story) is that those who aren’t willing to risk- as is risking to create, to feel, to have a spiritual inner life- often rip and tear at those that do. People are really hungry for what you do and how you live- so hungry it scares them and then you get made fun of.
Another thing about the nasty letter with you as a target- one of the key battles being played out in the world right now is the battle between what is real and what is not. It maybe THE key question underlying the other biggies- like we will destroy the world. Are we going to be authentic and stand for what is real or are we going to be sucked into living in the matrix? Are we going to live in a real way or in a made up way that doesn’t align with what has been true for all of humanity.
That struggle is being played out in all kinds of small ways in all kinds of small daily decisions we make and your ad free blog is one of those choices- and it pissed that guy off something fierce. The rise of blogs is partially a wave of being real!
My purpose in life is to "nurture people to wake up, including myself" or becoming more conscious through self-compassion and self-care. I’m starting to see my purpose as also encompassing "nurturing people to wake up to what is real for them." It is the theme of my novel and this new book I’m writing. It is the theme of my life in many ways. It excites me to think there are so many of us hearing this call!!!!
What is real for you? What does being real, living real, being authentic, mean to you? How does it really and truly play itself out in your day to day choices? I’d love to hear!
5 responses so far ↓
1 Photopoppy Mar 20, 2006
Thank you so much for posting this (and linking over to keri’s blog, which I haven’t read in a long time!)
I’ve just been the last few days drudging through what is real and what is not, I think…. wondering if it’s really worth the effort to create a different life, one that can’t be measured by traditional successes of home and family. After feeling defeated by a stupid mistake yesterday, I was really wondering if maybe I should hang up the camera and live in the matrix instead. Between my best friend chewing me out (in a kind way, honest!) for feeling sorry for myself and your lovely post, I’m feeling a lot better!
2 Alexandra Mar 20, 2006
What is real for me at this time is hard to write about. Through my twenties I felt like my most real and genuine self was calling the shots. Rather than letting my fears have the reigns, I let my dreams lead the way. But then a few years ago, I returned to the States and I sort of sunk into the life I thought I was “supposed to,” and I became much more interested in more traditional, “safer” ways of living in the world. Now I find in these past months that these conventional choices brought me not closer to more security financially and emotionally, but quite the opposite. So now I am wading through the marsh trying to find that core part of me that I had so very much taken for granted. Living real and authentically to me means honoring and cherishing that which brings me most alive. I wrote in my journal not that long ago, “Its this simple. When I write, I want to live. When I don’t write, I don’t want to.” Sounds dramatic, but it is true nonetheless. Living authentically therefore means making as much time as I can every day for that which makes me feel most alive, and that basically comes down to writing, being with dear family and friends, honoring my pain of this current period instead of trying to shoo it away to the side, and spending a lot of time in the present instead of the past, cherishing and accepting what is.
3 Melissa Mar 21, 2006
What is real for me is right in front of me. Not in tomorrow, not in my next meeting, not next week or in my next vacation. At times, I find myself still living like I’m planning for my real life. In my “real life” we’ll have a place in San Francisco overlooking the Golden Gate bridge, in my “real life”, I won’t stay at work until 10 PM at night when I was supposed to be at my friend’s house celebrating and creating ritual around the vernal equinox. In my “real life” I’ll have time for yoga and meditation, smile and laugh with my husband more. I realized yesterday (yet again!) that the real life comes in little surprises and every day activities. I was part of a seminar yesterday and the icebreaker was “what would be most surprising to know about you?” I was struck with how stumped I was by this. After all, I’m so transparent and people know everything about me at work–you get what you see. I ended up answering with a boring answer–that I’m taking dance lessons with my husband. So, just for fun I wrote my husband to ask him what he would say. After a difficult meeting and realizing I now had two presentations to give tomorrow so would be at work late again, I came back to my office excited about the opportunity yet feeling very overwhelmed. As I scrolled through the 50 new emails I had received, I opened the one from my husband with the subject, “what surprises me about the Mel(“the Mel” would be me). He shared things such as “She is from Wisconsin but cannot stand tempatures below 65 degrees”, “she hasn’t owned a television in nine years”
“she used to get herself confused with Madonna”. There were about 10 other items on the list, all written with love and a raw, intimate knowingness about who I am and how I express myself in the world. It was such a wonderful bright spot to my day and I realized in that moment as my eyes blurred with unexpected tears that that as my husband often says, “this is it–this is life”. I felt so lucky to be married to him, and felt a surge of calmness come over me. This is it–the long days, the deadlines, the opportunities before me at work, and the wonderful emails full of love from my husband.
4 Jennifer Louden Mar 21, 2006
What blasts of realness- thank you Poppy, Alexandra, and Melissa. What I see in all our writings is the common theme- what is happening is real. What we choose is real. This horrible evening and morning with my pre-teen and too much homework is real.
5 liz elayne Mar 21, 2006
Oh i love these questions. Being real and living authentically…to me this means I have to stop every day and check in with myself (or at least try to do this every day). I do this as I write my blog, as I take 5 minutes to meditate, as I do yoga, as I drink a cup of tea. Sometimes I can get all philosophical and I ask myself: Am I really living in my life? Am I awake or sleepwalking? But the stuff that makes up the “guts of life” as I say, gets in the way of this “higher” thinking, and sometimes I just sit quietly for one minute and try not to think about anything. Just allow myself that minute of self-care to breathe and reconnect with the little dancing girl who is inside my soul. For a long time I let her just sleep…and I realize she probably needed that. But in the last year, I have finally heard her whispering to me. And I am listening. And I have realized, that little girl is me.