This is the first part of an essay originally published in Body+Soul a few years back.  It popped into my mind during yoga because I was so proud of myself for being on my mat again, for just five minutes. Especially today when all I want to do is surf news sites.

It’s mid afternoon

and I’m feeling the itch to move my body, but instead I return phone calls, wipe the kitchen counter, sort my daughter Lilly’s school papers. I haven’t really moved in almost two weeks and I’m in “the box,” a place of parched fear, scratchy over-analyzing, and tart self-judgment.

I find myself here about five or six times a year, whenever I allow life to push me faster than I can keep pace spiritually and emotionally or whenever fear burbles in the background and I won’t stop to see what it wants. Then I narrow my focus to the bandwidth of “just get it done,” and when I lift my head, I find I’m in need of a major blast of passion and perspective but afraid to move toward it. The longer I’m in the box (or on the gerbil wheel or in the washing machine, pick your metaphor), the more tight and fearful I become.

I know what will free me and what will certainly comfort me:

allowing my body, not my mind, to move. Not to burn calories or tone my thighs or perfect a yoga pose but to shake and holler and swoop and let the energy move through me. Conscious movement (anything from free form funky yoga to whirling and wailing to Dance of Shiva) moves the stuck energy of holy-hell-what-if and judgments and hurry-up-freak-out so there is a little bit of space for ahh…

I’m okay right now.

Here I am.

Ahhh…. now what do I need right now to take care of myself?

The simplest thing I can do when I am afraid is to move but because it means feeling and letting go, I do everything but move

Tomorrow: a story to inspire you to move from one of my retreats.  In the meantime, why not step away from your computer right now and stretch your arms over head and sigh. Wiggle your hips. Look for something in your environment that gives you pleasure. Ahhh…

We are all feeling the tension of the impending election and we can so easily hold that tension in our bodies in ways that make us tired and grumpy and more fearful.  Why not let loose today- even just a teeny bit feels so good!