I was sailing along in a total spiritual bliss cycle — one with everything. And then suddenly, poof, yesterday driving to the grocery, it disappeared. I worked with accepting the mood change, I worked with asking myself if my thoughts (that my local bookstore is mad at me because I didn’t do an event there but they didn’t request me and they aren’t carrying the new book) were true, I worked with not working at it… yuck.
Then my pre-teen daughter descended into her incredibly horrible meanness, it’s like living with a toxic waste dump that is aiming all its toxicity right at your heart–and my Mom’s best friend is close to dying from the effects of chemo searing her intestines– I just want to hide under the covers.
Where did that bliss go? Maybe it’s under the covers, too!
Ah, the slings and arrows of this creative spiritual consciousness adventure. Today, I wish I were a little less consciousness, that’s for sure. But like the weather in the northwest, if I wait fifteen minutes, something will change.
4 responses so far ↓
1 Lain Ehmann Mar 13, 2007
I think the toughest part about mindfulness is that it means being there with the yuck as well as the yahoo times.
Cycles… it’s all cycles…
or as my two year old has taken to saying, “Karma, baby!”
(You haven’t laughed until you’ve heard a two year old tell you that).
xoxoxooxooxoxooxoxoooxoxoxoxo
Lain
2 Gigi Mar 14, 2007
This too shall pass. That’s my mantra, especially for this year. Right when I think “okay, enjoy the blessings of today” BOOM, somethings happens. Sometimes I need to take things minute by minute. And sometimes I crawl in bed and put my head under the covers. It is really hard (for me) when I have someone that I really love and cherish (like one of my kids) “turn on me”. I’m sending “up” good thoughts for you:)
3 Nicole Mar 16, 2007
I totally get this…how does it happen so fast?? This is the part of “being sensitive” that stinks. Glad to hear you’re back now. Your willingness to allow yourself to be reminded of the truth–that’s what keeps you going…awesome! Anyhow, I’ll order your book at Eagle Harbor this weekend and I’d like to take you up on the free CD offer. I’d be happy to pick it up. Should I email you to get specifics??
4 CathyJ Mar 24, 2007
I too have not just one pre-teen daughter, but two, so the avalanche of hormones can bowl the entire house over in one fell swoop. My poor husband… Two books have had a tremendous impact on me recently as it relates to how I experience life- “Conversations with God” and “The Power of Now”. What I have gotten is the- although fleeting- ability to be completely in the moment, no matter what is going on. It was life-altering when I got truly present to the fact that I was living 90% my life simply not “there”. Not with my kids, not with my husband, not at my job, not even eating the food causing the ever-present cellulite on my thighs. My mind would just take me somewhere else- to all the errands I had yet to do, the accounts I had to handle at work, you name it, I was thinking about it. So now as I muddle through life, no matter what is going on, if I can just STOP and be completely present to what I am doing- washing the dishes, listening to my daughter whine, I “get” in that moment, there really is nothing and all is well with the world.